Season 3, Episode 10: "A Benihana Christmas"
Quote:
- Angela: Meredith! If you don’t come to my party you will be very, very sorry.
- Meredith: Is that a threat?
- Angela: No. It’s an invitation.
Quote:
- Ryan: I miss the days when there was only one party I didn’t want to go to.
Quote:
- Andy: Nog-a-sake. One part eggnog, three parts sake. Some places won’t make it for you though because eggnog is seasonal.
Quote:
- Dwight: It is my job to be there for Michael. How can I be there for Michael if I am here for Michael?
Quote:
- Michael: Bro’s before ho’s. Why? Because your bro’s are always there for you. They’ve got your back after your ho rips your heart out for no good reason. And you were nothing but great to your ho. And you told her that she was the only ho for you and that she was better than all the other ho’s in the world. And then…and then suddenly she’s not your ho no mo’.
Quote:
- Andy: I can’t concentrate when I know you’re in pain man. Let me take you to lunch. Comon! My treat.
- Michael: Alright, nothing here to distract myself with anyway.
- Andy: That’s my boy. I know the perfect place too.
- Michael: Hooters?
- Andy: No. Benihana. Much classier. But don’t worry the babes are totally hot too.
- Michael: I need my entourage. Jim, Dwight, Ryan. Comon’, we’re going to Asian Hooters.
Quote:
- Dwight: Pam and Karen! I am ordering you to cease and desist all party planning immediately.
- Pam: You can’t do that.
- Dwight: As ranking number 3 in this office I am ordering you to…
- Andy: Ummm, I’m number 3.
- Dwight: You’re number 4.
- Andy: Yeah, but I’m number 3.
- Dwight: Uh no. You must turn over to me all Christmas decorations and party paraphernalia immediately that will be returned to you on January 4th.
- Jim: Ok, I think I can help here.
- Dwight: Ok good, they…
- Jim: As ranking number 2 I am starting a committee to determine the validity of the two committees and I am the sole member of the committee. We’ll act on this now.
- Dwight: Ok this is stupid.
- Jim: Can you please keep it down? I’m in session. [long pause] I’ve determined this committee is valid.
- Dwight: No, no, no. Wait. Permission to join the Validity Committee.
- Jim: [thinks about it] Permission denied.
- Dwight: Dammit!
Quote:
- Dwight: Michael? Sorry to interrupt. It appears that we’re one bathrobe short.
- Michael: Take it from Toby…
Quote:
- Michael: Fine! Have your party! Just no guests!
- Phyllis: But we invited guests.
- Michael: Well you know what Phyllis? All of your guests would have probably cancelled at the last minute anyway leaving your life a stupid rotten mess.
Quote:
- Michael: I’d like everybody’s attention. Christmas is cancelled.
- Stanley: You can’t cancel a holiday.
- Michael: Give it up Stanley and you’ll lose New Year’s
- Stanley: What’s that mean?
- Michael: Jim, take New Year’s away from Stanley!
Quote:
- Jim: It’s a bold move to Photoshop yourself into a picture with your girlfriend and her kids on a ski-trip with the real father. But then again, Michael’s a bold guy. Is bold the right word?
Quote:
- Michael: Hey! I would like a nice slice of Christmas Pam. Side of candied Pams and perhaps some…Pamchops…with mint.
Quote:
- Dwight: He was already dead and we Schrutes use every part of the goose. The meat has a delicious, smokey, rich flavor. Plus you can use the molten goose grease and save it in the refrigerator thus saving you a trip to the store for an expensive can of goose grease.
- Jim: Wow. Win-win.
Quote:
- Dwight: [looking at his dead goose] I accidentally ran over it, it’s a Christmas miracle!