Season 1, Episode 2: "Diversity Day"
Quote:
- Michael: Let me ask you, is there a term besides Mexican that you prefer? Something less offensive?
- Oscar: Mexican isn't offensive.
- Michael: Well...there are connotations...
Quote:
- Michael: Olympics of suffering right here! Slavery versus the Holocaust. Comon'!
Quote:
- Michael: Why don't I just kind of introduce myself. I am Michael and I am part English, Irish, German and Scottish. Sort of a virtual United Nations. but what some of you might not know is that I am part Native American Indian.
- Oscar: What part Native American?
- Michael: 2/15ths
- Oscar: That fraction doesn't make any sense.
- Michael: Well, you know what? It's kind of hard for me to talk about - the suffering.
Quote:
- Michael: Abraham Lincoln once said that if you are a racist, I will attack you with the North. And those are the principles that I carry with me in the workplace.
Quote:
- Michael: [to Toby] This is an environment of welcoming and you should just get the hell out of here.
Quote:
- Diversity Day Trainer: Now this is a simple acronym, H.E.R.O. At Diversity Today we believe it's very easy to be a hero. All you need are Honesty, Empathy, Respect and Open-mindedness.
- Dwight: Um, excuse me? I'm sorry but that's not all it takes to be a hero.
- Diversity Day Trainer: Great, well what is a hero to you?
- Dwight: A hero kills people - people that wish him harm. A hero is part human, and part supernatural. A hero is born out of a childhood trauma or out of a disaster that must be avenged.
- Diversity Day Trainer: Ok, um, you're thinking of a superhero.
- Dwight: We all have a hero in our heart.
Quote:
- Diversity Day Trainer: Now here's what we're going to do, I've noticed that...
- Michael: You know what? Here's what we're going to do. Why don't we go around and everybody - everybody - say a race that you are attracted to sexually. I will go last.
- Dwight: I have two. White and Indian.
- Diveristy Day Trainer Actually, I'd prefer not to start that way...
Quote:
- Dwight: Tit for tit.
- Jim: That's not the expression.
- Dwight: Well it should be.