Season 3, Episode 19: "Safety Training"
Quote:
- Michael: I saved a life…my own. Am I a hero? I can’t really say, but…yes.
Quote:
- Kevin: If someone gives you 10,000-to-1 on anything you take it. If John Mellencamp ever wins an Oscar I am going to be a very rich dude.
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- Dwight: [to the warehouse crew] Attention blue collar workers!
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- Michael: Darryl thinks he’s such a man because he works in a warehouse. Well big deal, I worked in a warehouse! Men’s warehouse.
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- Darryl: That’s what we been trying to tell you Mike. It’s serious down there. We do dangerous stuff man. This is shenanigans, foolishness, nerf-ball. Live a sweet little nerfy-life sitting on your biscuit never having to risk it.
Quote:
- Toby: It’s recommended that you take a 10 minute break from typing every hour. For your circulation you’re going to want to get up out of your chair and move around for about 10 minutes out of every hour.
- Michael: That’s good, fine, like stretching and…
- Toby: Your computer screen can be a big strain on your eyes. So it’s also recommended that you step away for about 10 minutes every hour.
- Michael: Wow, that time really adds up. That’s like a half hour every hour?
- Darryl: Take them at the same time.
Quote:
- Darryl: We do safety training every year, or after an accident. We’ve never made it a full year…
Quote:
- Darryl: Quiz! Mike, should you drive the forklift?
- Michael: I can and I have…
- Darryl: No, no, no, no. I said should you. You should not drive it. You should not drive the forklift, you understand?
- Lonny: You’re not allowed to drive the forklift!
- Darryl: It’s not safe, you don’t have a license.
- Michael: Guys I’m not the only one who has driven the forklift. Pudge has driven the forklift.
- Madge: Madge.
- Michael: I thought your name was Pudge.
- Madge: No, it’s always been Madge.
- Michael: Ok. Uh…her.
- Darryl: Her. Yes “her” is qualified to operate a dangerous machine. You are not. Ok?
Quote:
- Michael: I’m giving everyone a little bit of a treat. We are going to listen in on Darryl’s presentation in the warehouse and if I know Darryl, it’s gonna by zoppity.