Creed
Quote:
- Holly: I have to go over pencils and office supplies. It's part of the ethics thing.
- Oscar: That isn't ethics. Ethics is a real discussion of competing conceptions of the good. This is just the corporate anti-shoplifting rules.
- Andy: I'll drop an ethics bomb on you. Would you steal bread to feed your family? Boom!
- Oscar: Exactly Andy.
- Andyt: Yeah I took intro to philosopy. Twice. No big deal.
- Dwight: It's a trick question. The bread is poisoned. Also it's not your real family. You've been cuckolded by a stronger, smarter male.
Quote:
- Creed: Bankruptcy, Michael, is nature’s do-over.
tags: Creed | Season 4, Episode 4: "Money"
Quote:
- Creed: I’ve been involved in a number of cults both as a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower but you make more money as a leader.
tags: Creed | Season 4, Episode 1: "Fun Run"
Quote:
- Creed: [on Jan’s boob job] I find it offensive. Au naturale baby, that’s how I like ‘em. Swing low sweet chariots.
tags: Creed | Season 3, Episode 23: "The Job"
Quote:
- Creed: I’m a pretty normal guy. I do one weird thing. I like to go in women’s room for number 2.
Quote:
- Phyllis: I was walking to the building and this man asked me for directions and he was holding a map and when I walked over he had “it” out on the map.
- Angela: Phyllis, you’re a married woman!
- Creed: The guy was just hanging brain. I mean, what’s all the fuss? [aside] If that’s flashing then lock me up.
Quote:
- Creed: The only difference between me and a homeless man is this job. I will do whatever it takes to survive…like I did when I was a homeless man.
Quote:
- Karen: You can’t give paper clips to a baby. He might swallow them.
- Creed: Oh it’s ok, I’ve got tons of them.
Quote:
- Anna: Look what’s on his computer!
- Michael: What’s that, a squid’s eye?
- Anna: It’s my left breast.
- Michael: [to Creed] How did you...
- Creed: Right place at the right time.
Quote:
Ryan inadvertently stares at Anna while she’s using a breast pump
- Anna: Take a picture, it’ll last longer.
- Ryan: I’m sorry, it’s just…it’s a little distracting…
- Creed: Ditto that my brother.
Quote:
- Michael: Another thing about the Indian people: they love sex positions. I present to you the Kama Sutra. I mean look at that, who has seen that before?
- Creed: I have. That’s ‘The Union of the Monkey’
- Meredith: Oh that’s what they call it.
- Kevin: This is the best meeting we have ever had.
- Michael: Thank you Kevin.
Quote:
- Creed: I’m not offended by homosexuality. In the 60s I made love to many, many women – often outdoors in the mud and the rain – and it’s possible that a man slipped in. There’d be no way of knowing...